you must grow & you can grow (ghost print) Monotype of the Day #789

Day 57 of year 3

"You must change you life" is the final line of tonight's poem, Archaic Torso of Apollo by Rilke. After I named the first print it immediately came to mind. It's about a damaged sculpture of the Greek god Apollo. Although it doesn't exactly fit this piece, I've always loved the poem because it reminds me that there can be great power in brokeness. The speaker in the poem experiences this power and feels the call to transform. A variation of the last line, "You can change your life", has been my motto for many years. My deep belief in this idea, confirmed by my life and supported by my studio practice, has gotten me through some very difficult times. The circumstances of the external world sometimes, probably often, can not be changed but the inner world is always ripe for transformation. True and lasting change in the external world most often comes from healing the inner landscape. When our inner relationship to a situation changes, even though nothing in the world has shifted, everything feels different. These prints are depictions of change and growth in my inner world. (Poem below the title)

Archaic Torso of Apollo By Rilke, Trans Stephen Mitchell

We cannot know his legendary head
with eyes like ripening fruit. And yet his torso
is still suffused with brilliance from inside,
like a lamp, in which his gaze, now turned to low,

gleams in all its power. Otherwise
the curved breast could not dazzle you so, nor could
a smile run through the placid hips and thighs
to that dark center where procreation flared.

Otherwise this stone would seem defaced
beneath the translucent cascade of the shoulders
and would not glisten like a wild beast's fur:

would not, from all the borders of itself,
burst like a star: for here there is no place
that does not see you. You must change your life.

From Selected Poems: https://amzn.to/2Zfc1an

annunciation, the window, Monotype of the Day #759

Day 27 of Year 3

This is the ghost print from yesterday with a few layers printed on top. Yesterday felt like an important print in my spiritual development, a moment of absence and emptying. Consciously adding into that image today feels transformational.

What Else?
By Carolyn Locke

The way the trees empty themselves of leaves,
let drop their ponderous fruit,
the way the turtle abandons the sun-warmed log,
the way even the late-blooming aster
succumbs to the power of frost—

this is not a new story.
Still, on this morning, the hollowness
of the season startles, filling
the rooms of your house, filling the world
with impossible light, improbable hope.

And so, what else can you do
but let yourself be broken
and emptied? What else is there
but waiting in the autumn sun?

From The Place We Become https://amzn.to/3iC9rmb
Found on http://www.ayearofbeinghere.com/2015/10/carolyn-locke-what-else.html

nightscape, Monotype of the Day #725

Day 355 of Year 2 (Actually Day 360)

I haven't had much energy the past week. Life is full of choices but when your energy is limited your choices are like a knife slicing away parts of life that you love. Over time I've made peace with this aspect of my journey though sometimes, it's still not easy. In the US we are doers, but the beauty of my situation is in learning the power of being. Being is the place where creativity lives, where we find the ground from which all things must grow. Even unwanted pauses allow space for new ideas, work, or directions to root. I turn to tonight's poem (which I have posted before) to remind we of this because it's easy to forget when you desire to do but cannot.

Gitanjali #81
by Rabindranath Tagore

On many an idle day have I grieved over lost time. But it is never lost, my lord. Thou hast taken every moment of my life in thine own hands.
Hidden in the heart of things thou art nourishing seeds into sprouts, buds into blossoms, and ripening flowers into fruitfulness.
I was tired and sleeping on my idle bed and imagined all work had ceased. In the morning I woke up and found my garden full with wonders of flowers.

From Gitanjali https://amzn.to/38iqHao

dream of Light, Monotype of the Day #679

Day 309 of Year 2 (Actually Day 314)

I am really enjoying my time in the studio these days. I hit such a rough patch a few weeks back that I was actually thinking of giving up this project. I thought maybe it's run its course and I have nothing else to say in monotype. But I stuck with it through weeks of feeling uninspired and like I was repeating myself. Then one day without warning this new style came through. Now I feel renewed and everyday I am learning again. It feels like a bit of a miracle that so much growth sprung from such parched earth. This is the lesson given over and over in the studio, radical trust in process. Sometimes it is uncomfortable, but the dry patches are needed to move forward just as the ocean must recede to produce a new wave. It is the cycle of life and creativity.

the edge of night, Monotype of the Day #661

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Day 291 of Year 2 (Actually Day 296)

I mixed a color tonight that has a good amount of white in it. The white seems to have blocked a lot of the under (ghost) layer and also doesn't have the depth of the inks without white mixed in. Lesson learned. Every image that fails in someway is a doorway. There are a lot of failures in studio practice, some true failures and some perceived by the artist alone. It is so important to understand that failure is a vital, beautiful part of the process. Understanding this is like grease for your gears. It keeps the creative spring flowing instead of stopped up by disappointment.

Quatrain 1115
By Rumi, Trans Colman Barks

The minute I am disappointed, I feel encouraged.
When I am ruined, I am healed.
When I am quiet and solid as the ground, then I talk
the low tines of thunder for everyone.

From Open Secret, Versions of Rumi https://amzn.to/2YvQsm8 (A really wonderful collection)

life force, Monotype of the Day #621

Day 251 of Year 2 (Actually Day 256)

Tonight's poem has brought me so much solace in my life. In many ways, to people who live with long term illness, shelter in place is a familiar feeling. We have had to give up so many things over the years, parties, trips, important family events. We know how much it sucks and how much grief it brings. But we also know that we can grieve our cancelled events and come through on the other side. We have been forced to learn that beauty is possible amid loss and that waiting is just a skill. So now as we wait for this storm to pass I offer you tonight's poem as salve. My love and prayers to all those who are suffering or ill.

Gitanjali 81
By Tagore

On many an idle day have I grieved over lost time. But it is never lost, my lord. Thou hast taken every moment of my life in thine own hands.
Hidden in the heart of things thou art nourishing seeds into sprouts, buds into blossoms, and ripening flowers into fruitfulness.
I was tired and sleeping on my idle bed and imagined all work had ceased. In the morning I woke up and found my garden full with wonders of flowers.

From Gitanjali https://amzn.to/2Ux6jgV

greening, Monotype of the Day #589

Day 219 of Year 2 (Actually Day 224)

Yesterday's print was a fast demo piece for studio visitors. I cleaned the plate quickly and poorly 🙂 leaving some of the soap and ink. It left this interesting sort of striated pattern underneath the image. Tonight I played with that effect a little more intentionally. It's fun to experiment with something new. I am really exhausted from all the excitement around my show but also, and more importantly, profoundly nourished by all the beautiful interactions I've had with people. I think this image expresses the nurturing I've experienced. I am deeply grateful. Next Saturday 2/29 is the last day to see my show. The gallery will be open from 12-5pm and official closing reception begins at 2pm. I hope to see you there! xo

embryo, Monotype of the Day #555

Day 185 of Year 2 (Actually Day 190)

I have a number of larger projects bumping around in my head, but I'm feeling at a bit of a loss in the print studio. Getting my show put together was a major energetic completion. The new energies have not uncovered themselves yet. It's an uncomfortable moment which can easily derail an artist. No one likes to feel uncomfortable. No one likes to make work they're not happy with. The trick is just staying with the discomfort. It has to be ok to make incomplete, ugly, unsatisfying, whatever work. My trust in the process is absolute. Knowing that whatever it is being made today is necessary to bring an artist to the next step has carried me through many a rough patch.

From burweed
by Kobayashi Issa, Trans. Stryk and Ikemoto

From burweed,
such a butterfly
was born?

From Zen Poetry https://amzn.to/3anmIeT (A great book with a wide variety of poems and poets)

the sprout, Monotype of the Day #515

Day 149 of Year 2 (Actually Day 150)

“The seed is in the ground. Now may we rest in hope, while darkness does its work.” ~ Wendell Berry

Sometimes it's necessary get out of the studio, take a deep breath, and air out my head. Creativity is a beautiful mystery whose mechanisms are veiled. We aren't meant to know how it works, just to receive and bring that energy into the physical world. Getting out of the studio occasionally disengages the mind and gives space for that mystery to unfold and develop unconsciously. It releases control so surprising things can happen upon returning to work. Like a seed maturing underground, we know nothing of what is afoot until the first shoots break through. That is the beautiful adventure of being an artist.

the sprout
#monotypeoftheday
Year 2, Day 149
(Total project days 515)

sprouting, Monotype of the Day #514

Day 148 of Year 2 (Actually Day 149)

I'm not sure how I feel about this image. Part of this project is to post the good days and the off days, but I am excited that a new symbol is coming in: the sprouting seed, new growth. Today, new growth manifested as a shift in perspective. I realized my relationship to prepping for my show needed an overhaul. I've been pushing which is never a good space for making art. Art is about allowing what is to come through. Pushing creates a barrier to the natural creative flow. I decided to relax and trust all would be well, to wait and see how things unfold in their own time. Immediately three wonderful things happened. 1) A good friend popped in and helped look at a piece that was stalled, 2) I had a huge breakthrough with that piece, and 3) another friend offered me his truck to move work, a lovely gesture. All of a sudden I went from using my energy to push against what felt like a massive wall of work, to people showing up to help me. A lot got done today and I am much more at ease. What a difference a shift in perspective can make.

rooted II, Monotype of the Day #502

Day 136 of Year 2 (Actually Day 137)

Focusing on finishing up two new large sculptural paintings for my solo show in January. I have the strong desire to spend a whole day in the print studio but this other work calls. Instead, a print studio day will be my present for completing these last two pieces. I have way more work than gallery space and yet I am compelled to make more. I guess that is the nature of being an artist. The natural generative creative flow that undergirds and carries all life forward is infectious if you are listening.

rooted, Monotype of the Day #500

Day 134 of Year 2 (Actually Day 135)

Day 500! The second two lines of tonight's poem (see below) encapsulates this project for me: "I feel my fate in what I cannot fear.
I learn by going where I have to go." I am grateful that this is where I have to go. Thanks journeying along with me. Woohoo for reaching 500 and here's to day 501. xo

The Waking
By Theodore Roethke

I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
I feel my fate in what I cannot fear.
I learn by going where I have to go. We think by feeling. What is there to know? I hear my being dance from ear to ear. I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow. Of those so close beside me, which are you? God bless the Ground! I shall walk softly there, And learn by going where I have to go. Light takes the Tree; but who can tell us how? The lowly worm climbs up a winding stair; I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow. Great Nature has another thing to do To you and me; so take the lively air, And, lovely, learn by going where to go. This shaking keeps me steady. I should know. What falls away is always. And is near. I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow. I learn by going where I have to go.
From Collect Poems https://amzn.to/2sezWck)

weathering the storm, Monotype of the Day #499

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Day 133 of Year 2 (Actually Day 134)

Something about the stream of images last few days has felt important, like a major shift of energy. The move from falling to repose feels good. Since my life and my work are so intertwined, it's not surprising that there have been lots of small positive shifts there as well.
Tomorrow is day 500. That feels like a milestone, but milestones can be tricky. It's important to keep moving and not get caught up in labels. When I hit day 365, it threw me a bit and took some perseverance to get my flow back. Tomorrow presents just another invitation to work in the studio which I will gratefully accept.

cocoon, Monotype of the Day #493

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Day 127 of Year 2 (Actually Day 127)

Deep change happens beyond the comprehension of the mind. This is why it helps to surrender and trust. When the mind cannot understand something is afoot. The studio is a microcosm, trusting in the process here helps me trust out there in the world. The Artist trains me (an artist) everyday in my studio. This builds spiritual muscles that inform and change the way I lead my life. The result is my small "a" in artist keeps shrinking. The more it shrinks the happier and more empowered I feel. It's a beautiful sacred process and I am grateful to have a chance to pursue this work in the studio and in my spirit.

From burweed
By Kobayashi Issa, Trans. Stryk and Ikemoto

From burweed,
such a butterfly
was born?

From Zen Poetry: Let the Spring Breeze Enter https://amzn.to/2XpvtyM